New York City. 3 AM. Somewhere in Times Square Lady Gaga is having an irish coffee.
“I’ve declared I can spend a whole night snorting coke and listening to The Cure. Well, to be more specific, when my nose starts to bleed then I listen to Otherness. I became a huge fan of them… immediately”. Lady Gaga happily sighs and shows me a signed pic of Otherness Adrian with peculiar words dedicated to her: “Coke and Vegetables make the world go ‘round”.
Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta (Lady Gaga’s real name) keeps on telling me how happy she’s with the fact that 4 young unknown boys from the 3rd World got the chance to be released in USA and Europe. “The World Wide Web is so generous…” she remarks. In the meantime she sings along with Otherness Gonzalo to “April 17th”. “It’s a beautiful electro-ballad”, she says and adds “I’d love to roll up some joints for them. I can picture the situation, the four of them pouring white wine on my breast… Ah…lovely”.
We moved on to Carmine’s. I asked Lady Gaga “Why do you prefer Italian food to American food?” She didn’t even pay attention to a single word coming out of my mouth. She’s “dancing” like a sexy young girl possessed by a sudden assault of epilepsy. She passes the headphones onto me. The song is “Discern”. “These boys know what’s going on. The lyrics are great; Otherness Martin has an original accent and pronunciation. My left hand makes all the way to my crotch… OH MY GAWD when they sing together near the end my kidney bean is on fire!!!”
It’s late. I mean, we are going through the early morning with vampire’s faces. Lady Gaga is singing to “Fix & Fuss”. She tells me about the time she was romantically involved with a heavy metal drummer. “I love drummers and Otherness Pablito told me how to identify a heavy metal drummer… Do you know how? They are douchebags from the very beginning…” We waved goodbye and I was wondering if Lady Gaga should sing “Alejandro” tonight on American Idol or not. I think she’ll feel happier hanging around with Otherness boys, I concluded.
